Texas Daddy Read online

  “I would dare to say you might be the same way.” He softened the hard hit with his beautiful grin.

  She nodded. “Yes, I remember Momma laughing and teasing my dad that I was just like him, so he didn’t have room to get mad at me.” She looked directly at Adrian. “You have to keep an open door with Mia. Don’t start hiding things thinking you’re protecting her. She knows something’s wrong and it can start creating a wall between you.” She pulled on her bottom lip. “Then when she really needs you, there will be a chasm she thinks she can never cross.”

  He nodded and leaned back, draping an arm over the back of the chair. “You know I mentor teen parents. I tell them all the time that once you start hiding from the truth, life gets more complicated. It’s harder to live by that advice than to give it.”

  “Now, that’s one hundred percent truth.” While Adrian scanned the room, Nikki took the opportunity to study him. He looked relaxed. The easygoing mannerisms he showed the world hid the complexity that drove him to be a better dad and man.

  The kind of man that might make it worth staying in Clear Water. She shook her head and stood up, needing to move and clear her thoughts. The kind of thoughts that would only get her hurt. Who was she kidding? After his reaction to Charlotte, how would he feel about a woman who gave her baby away?

  “You okay?” Concern softened his deep brown eyes.

  She turned her back to him. “Yeah. Restless. We’ve been up here sitting too long. I need to move.” Away from him and the fantasy that he could ever want a romantic relationship with her. She suspected if asked, he had her firmly in the friend camp. That made her safe to talk to. Safe to take to dinner.

  He touched her arm. “How’s your knee? Would you be able to explore the ranch?”

  She shook her head. “I promised to stay away from any off-road trips on my bike. I’d have to get a new bike anyway, and there’s that money issue.”

  He laughed. “Do I look like I ride a bicycle?” He glanced down at his jeans and worn cowboy boots. “You want to get out, and our music date isn’t until Thursday. I was thinking you could take it slow on a horse. Tomorrow, after church, my sister is taking Mia into Kerrville for a girls’ afternoon and I was gonna put some mileage on our two-year-olds. You could visit Swift and we could go riding. If we keep it at a walk, your knee should be fine. We’ll stay off the rocky side of the hills. It’ll be some safe PT.”

  She snorted. “That sounds nice. I would love to explore my mom’s ranch. I didn’t get far before the rain and the deer. Then the fall. Not my finest moment.” One of the most humiliating moments in her life. “How is she doing? The fawn. Swift, right?”

  “Growing and getting into trouble. Like any healthy kid.” He stood and walked past her, stopping at the doorway to the back room. Fists planted on his hips, he shook his head. “I can’t believe I had that much anger in me.”

  “Ten years is a long time to keep it buried.”

  “This can’t be healthy. I’m so sorry. I’ve never thrown this kind of fit before, even when she left. I’ve kept it together. Did I scare you?”

  “No. I just wasn’t sure what to do. I didn’t want to leave you alone, but I didn’t want to intrude either.”

  “Thanks for staying.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I guess it’s time to head over to Mom’s.” He looked over his shoulder. “I’ll take the letter and give it to Mia.” He just stood there looking back at the table, but not making a move to get the letter.

  Nikki picked it up and handed it to him. As he took the note from her, sparks ran up her arm and straight to her gut. For a moment, they made eye contact. Her breath froze. With a jerk, she brought her hand back to her side and rubbed it against her jeans. It was just a touch. He still maintained eye contact. “You sure you’re okay?”

  She nodded. Sadness squeezed her heart. Because of her mistakes, she would never be the kind of woman Adrian could love. Every nerve in her body told her he was the kind of man that once he loved you, he loved you for a million years. Then a million more. “I’m good. I think I might be getting tired.”

  He reached out and, with a gentle touch, held her upper arm. “Do you need help?”

  “No, no.” She stepped back and made sure to smile at him. “You have a daughter to talk to. You can’t let the sun go down on this. You have to deal with it head-on, like you deal with everything else.”

  He nodded and looked away. “I might have a harder time with my family than Mia.” He sighed and tucked the letter into his front shirt pocket. “You would think I’d know by now that the only certainty in life is the unpredictable. Will you pray for us?”

  “I will. Even for Charlotte. I know you’ll do what’s best for your daughter.”

  He chuckled. “It’s hard being the adult.”

  “I wouldn’t know.” She winked at him. Her heart needed some space. She couldn’t afford to be falling in love with Adrian De La Cruz.

  “I guess I’ll see you at church tomorrow. Remember to bring a change of clothes and we’ll head straight to the ranch.”

  “Okay.” Church. She was going to church then riding with Adrian. Why had she agreed to that? Because she was going stir-crazy sitting around, but she wasn’t allowed to go exploring on her own. She could be friends with Adrian while she was in Clear Water. She was a grown woman.

  He disappeared down the side stairs. All the blood left her body, and she collapsed into the closest chair. Dropping her head into her hands, she prayed. She prayed for Mia, Adrian, all of his family and Charlotte. Then she prayed for herself. Tears started falling.

  Witnessing all of Adrian’s anger turn physical made her realize how much she had been carrying in her heart. She slipped to the floor, and her hurt knee protested as she asked for forgiveness. For the first time in a decade, she turned everything over to God.

  A warm touch caused her to jump. Adrian had come back and found her like this. Pushing her hair out of her face, she looked up and found her father. Pulling her up from the floor, he cupped her face.

  “Nicole? Please tell me what’s wrong. There isn’t anything we can’t get through together. I promise.”

  From the day her mom died, she wanted to take the sadness out of her father’s eyes. To be the one who put even more there, it tore her heart apart.

  “I’m so sorry, Daddy.” He pulled up into one of the chairs. Like a little girl of seven, she sat in his lap, protected in his arms.

  Her stomach quivered. One deep breath and it all came out. She told him about Tommy and the baby. About her fears. She told him about the old boyfriend who took everything from her. She even told him about her conflicted feelings about Adrian. Years of not talking to her father came to an end.

  His arms tightened, holding her closer. Not one word passed his lips. Exhausted, she rested her cheek against his shoulder. Her tears fell on her arm. Sitting up, to wipe them away, she realized they belonged to her father.

  She cupped his face, just as he had done to her, and an image flashed in her brain. Her father’s tears, and her tiny hands holding his face. “Don’t cry, Daddy. I’ll be good. I promise.” She had broken her promise.

  The warmth of his long fingers brought her back to the present. “I’m so sorry, Daddy. I messed up and made it worse by hiding it from everyone.”

  “We all make mistakes.” He gave her his secret grin she loved. “I married Sheila, but we have Samantha because of her. There’s a family that was formed because of your decisions.”

  Love for this man who raised her and loved her exploded her heart into pieces. The words not said over the years were understood. She wrapped her arms around him and hugged him as if she was still the little girl who wanted to make everything right in a torn world. “I love you, Daddy. I’m so sorry.”

  She was curled up in his lap, and his long arms pulled her closer. “Shh. None
of that nonsense. I’m so happy you’re home. I love you so much, baby girl.” Large hands cradled her head. He pressed his cheek against hers. “I’m the one who’s sorry.”

  In the middle of the old room, surrounded by decades of forgotten chairs, they sat in silence. For over a decade, she had been lost without even knowing it. Maybe God brought her home for this very reason. Closing her eyes, she took in the comforting smell of home and love. Thank You, God.

  For the first time in twelve years, her heart settled. Her world was stabilizing. Except for the feelings she had for Adrian. What could she do about those? She doubted he would celebrate her decision to give up her son after what she’d witnessed with Charlotte arriving back in his life.

  He wouldn’t understand why she chose to give her baby to another family. With a sigh, she settled against her father’s heartbeat. She’d worry about that later. Right now, she just wanted to be the little girl wrapped up in her daddy’s arms.

  Chapter Nine

  Adrian glanced at his daughter. The yellow ribbon that tied off her braid had slipped loose and threatened to fall off. He reached over and quickly retied it. Looking up at him, she smiled. Yeah, he tended to worry and be overprotective, but wasn’t that a dad’s job? He rested his hand on her small shoulder and squeezed.

  When he’d told her that her mother had visited and had given him a letter for her, he’d expected her to want to read it. Instead she narrowed her eyes and stared at him for a long while before asking what he wanted her to do.

  That had caught him off guard. What did he want? He wanted Charlotte to go back wherever she came from and stay out of their lives. He had hesitated. Closing his eyes, he had prayed for the right words. None came, so he told her he wasn’t sure how he felt.

  “Earth to Dad.” Mia lightly jabbed him with her elbow.

  He glanced around. People were getting up from the pews. George laughed. “I think he might be distracted.” He nodded to the pew in the front, where the Bergmann sisters sat.

  “Dad, I said you need to stop by Fred’s Tacos and get some of the barbacoa for your date. Lizzy says it’s her aunt’s favorite thing to eat.”

  “It’s not a—”

  “Hey, mija. Are you ready to do some shopping?” His sister Leti hugged Mia from the back. With her arms around her, she rested her chin on his daughter’s head. “You’re getting taller!”

  “Shopping? I thought you were going to the children’s museum.” He scowled at his sister. He budgeted their shopping trips and he didn’t have the extra money right now unless he went into his savings.

  “Oh, stop scowling at me. If a single, hardworking woman can’t splurge on her favorite niece, what good is it?” She looked down at Mia. “Are you ready?”

  A sweet giggle came from his daughter. He hoped she never outgrew that sound. “I’m your only niece.”

  She shrugged. “I’m sure you would be my favorite if I had twenty. Let’s go.”

  “Yes, ma’am. As soon as I know Daddy is set. He’s going on a date with Nikki.”

  “It’s not a date.” He tried to keep his voice low so others wouldn’t overhear. “We’re just going riding over her mother’s ranch.” All three sets of brown eyes looked at him as if they didn’t believe a word of it. He sighed and scanned the room for Nikki. He really wanted to get on his horse and get away from all the people who wanted to meddle in his life. Somehow, she had become the calm spot in the midst of his storms.

  “I just don’t want you to mess this up, Daddy.”

  George laughed. “Oh, he will.”

  Sometimes he really didn’t like his brother. Leti took Mia’s hand. “Remember to have fun, Adrian, and smile. Women like it when you smile.” She winked at George.

  Before Leti got too far, Adrian reached for her arm and leaned in close, so no one would hear. “Let her talk about her mother if she wants, and be nice. Don’t say anything negative. Just let Mia talk.”

  His sister’s face tightened with a stiff nod. She put her arms around Mia, and they walked off. An empty feeling gripped him as he watched them leave. They were going to Kerrville. What if they ran into Charlotte?

  “Hi, George. Adrian.”

  He turned and found Nikki standing there. She wore a soft green dress that swirled when she walked. He tried to remember if he’d ever seen her in a dress before today. Her hair was down, falling around her neck and brushing her shoulders.

  “Hey, Nikki.” George gave her a quick hug. “You kids have a wonderful day. I’m heading to Uvalde. See you tonight. Maybe we can all have dinner together.” With a wink, he punched Adrian then left them standing there, alone.

  She crossed her arms over her waist then dropped them only to put them back. “I went to get coffee, and my family left me. I guess they thought I was going directly to the ranch with you.”

  He chuckled. “My family made sure I was alone too. Family. Can’t live with them, and you can’t, well...shoot them. I’m parked out back.” He held out his hand to help her down the steps.

  Her first reaction was to pull away. Then he heard her take a deep breath. She smiled and put her hand in his. “Thank you.”

  Progress. He started whistling.

  * * *

  Falling into step next to him, Nikki tried to figure the best way to ask about Mia and Charlotte. It had been on her brain all night and day. It was probably the closest she had ever been to continuous prayer.

  He opened his truck door for her and once again offered up a hand. This time she smiled for real. It didn’t even occur to him she might be offended.

  Of course, today she did feel a little different. Her sisters dressed her up for church and she wasn’t sure how she felt about it. As soon as she could, she would change her clothes. Oh no, my bag. They took off with—

  “I’m thinking this belongs to you.” He lifted her backpack from the bed of his truck.

  “How thoughtful of them to drop off my things after abandoning me.” Her sisters were working overtime getting her together with Adrian.

  As he slipped into the driver’s seat, he passed the bag over to her. Then his focus turned to driving. In his starched blue button-up shirt and jeans, he looked so handsome.

  “Mia didn’t read the letter.”

  His voice pulled her out of her daydreams. “What?”

  He glanced at her. “I told Mia about Charlotte and our visit yesterday.”

  “What did she say?”

  “She asked me what I thought and how I felt. When I told her I wasn’t sure, she nodded and said she didn’t know either. She asked if she could hold the letter for now. She said she’d let me know when she was ready to read it.”

  “Are you happy about her reaction?”

  A half-hearted chuckle lifted his solid shoulders. “It’s a relief to have talked with her. I was so afraid of her being hurt, I avoided the topic. Looking back, I’m sure it had a lot to do with my own anger. When I’m working with the teen parents, I talk to them about dealing with emotions honestly. I encourage them to take the time to dig down into the root of the emotion. Is it jealousy, anger or pride? It’s so much easier to point out others’ splinters.”

  As they went through town, people waved. Adrian would give the two-finger wave from the top of his steering wheel.

  She sighed. “That’s what Pastor John talked about today.”

  “Yep. Amazing all the ways God will talk to you if you’re listening.”

  Watching the town disappear into open pastures and hills, Nikki adjusted her seat belt. “I’m not sure He talks to me anymore. This is the first time I’ve been to church since I left Clear Water.”

  “Really? You know He’s not just hanging out in church. He’s everywhere, and He’s always talking. We just let all the other voices and business of life keep us distracted. On the ranc
h, in the saddle, is where I hear Him the most.”

  She was pretty sure He would’ve been yelling at her anyway. Go home, Nikki. Tell the truth, Nikki. Apologize to everyone you hurt, Nikki. She closed her eyes.She needed her own twelve-step program. Maybe that was just her guilt talking and not God.

  God, I’m home and I have told the truth to my family. What now? They passed her mother’s family ranch. The gate was still locked. It was hard to think of it as her ranch. Her father hated the place.

  The massive Childress entry gate loomed on the horizon. Adrian turned into the ranch road, his hands sure and steady on the steering wheel. She even loved the way his hands moved.

  Before contemplating a real relationship with him, she needed to decide where she was going. It wasn’t just about them. It would also affect his daughter.

  * * *

  After spending time watching the growing fawn play and take her bottle, Adrian had walked Nikki to the barn and saddled the horses.

  Now they were deep into the Cortez original homestead. At one time, it was one of the largest ranches. After generations of families divided and split it up, however, Nikki and her sisters only had about seven hundred acres. Even at that, Adrian couldn’t imagine owning a property like this, let alone having it handed to you. It was such a waste, allowing it to go untended.

  Adrian settled into the saddle. He checked Zeta again. She tossed her head, not liking the slow pace Tank was traveling.

  “Adrian De La Cruz, you put me on a babysitter horse, didn’t you?” She nudged the red-spotted Appaloosa and flicked the reins, trying with no success to get the gelding to move faster than a slow walk. He twisted his ears back and forth, but kept his head down and his hooves plodding. “I can’t believe you didn’t trust me enough to put me on a real horse.”